Prince Harry Pulled a Dakota Johnson on His Dad

Who could forget that fateful November day in 2019 when the queen of daytime entertainment, Ellen Degeneres, was taken to task by none other than Dakota “I Love Limes” Johnson? For those whose brains are occupied with more important information like how to pay down your credit card bill, basically what happened was that Ellen bemoaned not being invited to Johnson’s 30th birthday party when Johnson hit back with, “Actually, no, that’s not the truth, Ellen.” Ellen had indeed been invited. Cue dramatic music (and the beginning of Ellen’s downfall).

The spiritual inverse of that exchange occurred on Monday when Prince Harry had to “Actually, Ellen” his own father. Over the weekend, The Sunday Times published a piece that mentioned King Charles is turning 75 next week and set to have a small birthday celebration with family and friends, adding that “The King will miss his second son at his birthday party.” This seemingly suggests that Harry was definitely invited to the birthday but gave a hard no thanks. The two, if you haven’t heard, don’t proper get along these days.

This is where Harry had to put on his big-girl Dakota Johnson pants. A spokesperson for the estranged prince told The Messenger on Monday that, “In response to UK media headlines, there has been no contact regarding an invitation to His Majesty’s upcoming birthday. It is disappointing the Sunday Times has misreported this story.”

“Actually, King Charles, that is not the truth!!!!” Harry has essentially declared! The prince’s team is claiming that the King sent no invite in the first place, therefore making Charles’ sadness at his son’s absence absolutely nonsensical. Of course, the Firm being sneaky and duplicitous should come as no surprise. It’s what they do best.

Somewhere, a sly grin is forming on Dakota Johnson’s face. Her legacy of setting birthday party invites straight continues.

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