Being An Introvert -
I would say that the majority of people who meet me automatically assume I'm an extrovert.
And I think they assume that because I'm approachable and easy to talk to. Most times when I am in the presence of someone new, I am the one who will initially say hello, shake hands, and introduce myself.
Also, I can talk to anyone. Even total strangers.
Which, at times, can be trying because strangers here who walk our city streets, ride public transportation, or frequent places like coffee shops will often walk over to me and ask such things as, "Sir, can you give me money?" Or, "Bro, can you go into that liquor store and buy me some whiskey?" Or, "Hey, my wife recently dumped me and I lost my wallet. Can you give me the train fare to New York? Oh, and also buy me shoes and some dinner before I get on the train?"
Not only must I look like an extrovert to these strangers, but also an ATM machine.
But trust me, as approachable and easy as I am to talk to, ask anyone who has known me for a long time that I can be very direct when I have to. I don't have a problem telling these money moochers, "No, and get the hell away from me!"
But I also think people assume I'm an extrovert after they find out that I used to be a stage actor. They believe that because I could stand in front of an audience of 400 people, I must be an extrovert. Yet, what they don't realize is that MOST actors (stage or screen) are introverts. Actors are usually very quiet and private in their offstage/screen lives. Back when I was performing in a stage play after the curtain came down each night, I would immediately go home, take a shower, eat something light while watching a movie, sip a glass of wine, and then go to bed. Like Greta Garbo once said, "I want to be alone."
Currently, I work with the public all day (which I thoroughly enjoy) and am constantly talking and interacting with many different clients, who ask me a lot of questions. So, when I come home at night, talking is the last thing I want to do.
I want peace, quiet, and alone time.
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A few weeks ago while online, I came across these two introvert lists that described me perfectly.
Things Introverts DON'T Like 😒
- Loud and crowded spaces
- Unexpected visitors
- People invading their personal and private space
- Inauthentic conversations & meaningless small talk
- People who don't understand their sensitivities and needs
- Personal drama
- Overbearing relationships/friendships
- Too much stimulation in their external environment
- Being told what to do by other people
Things Introverts LOVE 💚
- Deep meaningful conversations
- Working without interruptions
- Time to recharge their energy
- Being in nature
- Calming and uncluttered spaces
- Intimate soulful gatherings
- Substance-filled friendships
- People who aren't loud or aggressive
- Being in the comfort of their own home
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I also found this online:
The Difference Between Introverts And Extroverts -
🔋 Introverts recharge through alone time.
🪫 Extroverts are drained by being alone.
🧠Introverts need time to process their thoughts.
🗣 Extroverts process by speaking.
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So, are you more of an introvert or extrovert?
Have a fantabulous week, everyone! ☮
VERY interesting post, Ron! Loved it! I always considered myself an extrovert until I took the Myers-Briggs personality test in college and discovered that I was an introvert. After reading my results, it made perfect sense to me. I AM introvert!
ReplyDeleteI love that you shared the lists because many of the things on both lists are so me!
- People invading their personal and private space - yes!
- Personal drama - yes! I call them "Drama Queens" Lol!
- Overbearing relationships/friendships = yes!
- Deep meaningful conversations - yes!
- Intimate soulful gatherings - yes!
- Substance-filled friendships - yes!
And I definitely recharge be being alone. I enjoy being with other people, but only in small gatherings. The friendships I have are not many, but they're quality relationships that have lasted a long time.
I can see why people assume you're an extrovert because you have a magnetic energy about you.
I'm going to forward this post to my friends. They'll enjoy it as much as I did.
Thank you, Ron! xox
"but also an ATM machine." -- Ron, I wish you could have heard me bust out laughing when I read that. HILARIOUS! You know, I used to live in a city, so I know exactly what you mean about the wacko strangers that constantly walk up to you and ask for money. And know, with all the stuff going on all over, I can only imagine how much worse it's gotten. I am so glad I no longer live in the city. I don't mind visiting, but I don't want to live there.
ReplyDeleteI am an introvert. My boyfriend is a total extrovert, but it works because we balance each other. He loves to socialize a lot. Whereas, I'm content being at home. Or, if I do socialize, I like it to be a small group of friends. I also don't mind spending time alone, while my boyfriend socializes with his buddies. It gives us time apart, which I think is healthy.
"- Intimate soulful gatherings" - that's me!
Fascinating post, Ron! I love the photograph at the top.
Hola Denise!
ReplyDeleteOMG, me too! I always thought I was an extrovert. That is, until a friend of mine in Florida, who was a college teacher, gave me the Myers-Briggs test, which resulted in pegging me as an introvert. I was confused at first, but after I read all the info on introverts, I realized I was! In fact, the friend of mine thought I'd be an extrovert too.
Isn't the list spot on? Each and everyone on the list, for me, described me exactly.
" I enjoy being with other people, but only in small gatherings. The friendships I have are not many, but they're quality relationships that have lasted a long time."
You sound just like me. I feel that as well! I don't have a lot of friends, but the ones I do have are quality. And we've been friends for YEARS.
Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing on this topic, my friend! I love reading what other people are. Have a faaaaaaaaabulous week!
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Good evening, Abby!
ReplyDeleteThat's was I feel like half the time - a freaking ATM machine because people on the streets are always asking me for MONEY! $$$$ And let me tell you, it's gotten WAY worst over the past two years. It happens everyday, ALL day. I used to LOVE living in a city. Not any more. Trust me, I'm searching. Hopefully by the fall before my lease renews.
"I am an introvert. My boyfriend is a total extrovert, but it works because we balance each other. He loves to socialize a lot. Whereas, I'm content being at home."
Interesting! That's how my parents were. My dad was a HUGE social butterfly, but my mother was not. She didn't mind socializing occasionally, but my father could go, go, go every night. He loved to have lots of people around him. My mother enjoyed small gatherings, or simply enjoyed time at home with my father and siblings.
Thanks so, so much for stopping by and sharing your thoughts and feelings on this topic. Enjoyed your comment! Hope you're week is going great!
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Ron, hands down an introvert! And I never realized just how much of an introvert I was until I read your don't and do lists. Wow! Everything on those lists are me to a T!
ReplyDeleteI cherish my space (personal and private) and am very picky about who enters that space. I also don't like when people drop by without calling first. I don't mind parties, but intimate ones.
My ears are very sensitive to noise, so I'm not crazy about LOUD talking people. Drives me crazy. At work, I like completely one task at a time. I'm not very good at multi-tasking. Clutter makes me nervous. I like things uncluttered and clean. My desk at my office is so organized. I am so OCD about it. LOL!
I like how your blog posts are always on different topics. You offer a great combination of information, humor, and thought-provoking. Thanks!
Ron, it's so interesting to read about your time as an actor and how you could perform in front of theater filled with hundreds of people, but are an introvert. And I believe you 100% because a friend of mine, who also acted (stage and film), said the same thing. He too is an introvert. But oh my god, put him onstage and suddenly he became an extrovert. Ha! Such a good actor is was. He could sing and dance too.
ReplyDeleteI'm an introvert as well. I think all artists and creative people are. We need our time alone to recharge and get inspired.
- Too much stimulation in their external environment - That's why I can't do nightclubs or noisy restaurants. Too much stimulation.
I'm going to email this post to my actor friend. I think he'll really enjoy it!
Question: When you did theater, did you do comedy? Drama? Musicals? Do you sing?
P.S. to my previous comment...Question: When you did theater, did you do comedy? Drama? Musicals? Do you sing? I'm just curious.
ReplyDeleteEvening, Daniel!
ReplyDeleteAren't those lists so accurate? When I found them online, I immediately thought, "Hey...that's ME!"
"I cherish my space (personal and private) and am very picky about who enters that space. I also don't like when people drop by without calling first. I don't mind parties, but intimate ones."
OMG, you sound JUST LIKE ME! My space is my sacred space, so I'm not one who likes people dropping by without first calling. And I would do the same before I ever went to someone else home/apartment. I would never just stop by.
I'm not good at multi-tasking either. I like to complete one task at a time, then go to the next. I used to work with someone who would do three tasks all at the same time and none of them were ever fully. completed. But she thought she excelled at muti-tasking. However, the only thing she excelled at was making incomplete messes everywhere. HA!
I'm OCD too. Particularly when it comes to certain things.
Thanks so much for stopping by and for your kind words, Daniel! Really enjoyed reading your comment!
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Good morning, Candice!
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing the story about your actor friend in your comment! Many people don't realize that most actors are not extroverts. But I can see why they wouldn't because of the profession.
"He too is an introvert. But oh my god, put him onstage and suddenly he became an extrovert. Ha! Such a good actor is was. He could sing and dance too."
Lol! Me as well! I remember my parents watching me in my first high school play. And after it was over, my mother said to me, "Oh my god, where did all that come from. You're normally so shy!?!"
"I think all artists and creative people are. We need our time alone to recharge and get inspired."
Yes, you nailed it! Most artists and creative people tend to be reflective, while creating either artwork or a character onstage or in film. So, we tend to need quiet time.
Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing on this topic, Candice! Have a grrrreat rest of your week!
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I started out doing comedy because that was the genre that felt the most comfortable (and natural) to me. I didn't think I could do drama, however, as I started to get more and more involved in the theater, I realized that I enjoyed more dramatic roles. I didn't think I could sing either. That is, until I went to acting school in NYC and took "voice" as one of required classes. And yes, I performed in many musicals during my career.
ReplyDeleteBut I will say that COMEDY is my all-time favorite genre.
Ron, I can understand people who first meet you assuming you're an extrovert. But us creative/artist types are pretty much across the board introverts.
ReplyDeleteI think introverts tend to prefer more solo activities, like reading, writing, or just spending time alone, and feel drained by too much social interaction. Extroverts tend to enjoy and thrive on socializing and being around others, and feel energized by social interactions.
I think the difference is an "energy" thing.
Needless to say, I'm an introvert. My friendships are a mixture of introverts and extroverts.
Cool topic!
"I think the difference is an "energy" thing."
ReplyDeleteRobert, you summed it up perfectly! You're right, it IS an "energy" thing. Some people find social interaction energizing, while others find it draining. It's funny because as far as work (my job) goes, I thoroughly enjoy being face to face, interacting with lots of people. However, at the end of the day, I can feel drained, so I need to recharge by being alone. I also like to travel alone.
Most of my close friendships are with other introverts.
GREAT comment, Robert! Thanks for sharing! Happy Wednesday!
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‘No, and get the hell away from me!’ made me chuckle. I can just picture you saying that!
ReplyDeleteI honestly don’t know what I am. I was a quiet kid, but became outgoing by the time I was 16 thanks to an experience that broke me out of my shell. But I can totally relate to your list of things that introverts don’t like. Maybe we are both outgoing introverts? Is that a thing?
It’s funny, because I love attending large group events and meeting new people. I can become ‘besties’ with someone in one night. However, I hate when a friend has a birthday dinner at a restaurant and invites a dozen people. It’s too many conversations going on at once and I feel as though I’m stuck in my seat and can’t enjoy my friends. Makes no sense, but that’s just how I feel. I usually decline or leave early. And omg, I can’t stand small talk. Like, why do people insist on talking about the weather? I’d rather be asked about my favorite color🤣🤣🤣
But, I’m really not a homebody and I prefer to leave the house every day to do something, even if it’s just the grocery store. And I do love drama🤓 So, I’m really not sure!
Thanks for sharing the lists and your personal preferences, Ron! Enjoy your Hump Day! XO
"I can just picture you saying that!"
ReplyDeleteLOL! Aren't I wicked? However, when you have this kind of thing happen to you over and over again, almost everyday, you get over it and just say, "Get the hell away from me!" And they do!
"Maybe we are both outgoing introverts? Is that a thing?"
Yes, that could very well be a thing.
"I prefer to leave the house every day to do something, even if it’s just the grocery store."
Me too! But I like doing that alone, or with one of my close friends (like Kelly).
I can't stand small talk either.
From what I read about the differences between introverts and extroverts it's HOW a persons choose to recharge.
If being alone and quiet - introvert
If surrounding yourself with other people - extrovert
My father was an extrovert. He LOVED to be around people (have parties, dinners, and socialize in large groups), and he enjoyed doing that a lot. My mother was like me, an introvert. She could spend time around people, but needed to get away and be alone to recharge. She also didn't like smothery friendships, where she was obligated to check-in with everyone everyday. I'm the same way.
Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your thoughts on this topic, my friend. Very much enjoyed your comment!
Happy Hump Day!
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Ron, thank god my hubby and I are both the same - introverts. When I was younger, though, I was definitely an extrovert. Throughout my high school and college years, I was Miss Social Butterfly. LOL! I was on various organizing committee's in college. I couldn't get enough of socializing. But something changed as I got older, I no longer wanted to do those things. I got much less social. I met my husband in my late 20s and something clicked, we were so much the same in many areas. One being, less social. We have a nice group of close friends that we enjoy going out to dinner with now and then, and getting together for the holidays.
ReplyDeleteWhat I love about our relationship is that we can tell when each of us needs time alone and we allow that. He does his thing, I do mine. We have similar interests, but also different interests.
Wonderful post, dear man! And being from NY, I had to laugh when you talked about the people coming up to you on the streets and panhandling. So true. And I loved your response!
Hope you're enjoying a great week! xo
Elaine you sound just like me! When I was younger, I too was Mr. Social Butterfly Lol! I didn't go to college, but in my last two years in HS, I suddenly came out of my "shy cocoon" and went bonkers with social activities. But for me, I think that came from being unpopular to suddenly being very popular with kids my age. I suddenly had people wanting to be my friend, I went on dates, and parties on the weekends. And like you, as I got older (in my late 20's early 30s), something changed. Even when I got into theater, I enjoyed the process of being around a lot of people when rehearsing and performing. But outside of that, I craved solitude and quiet time.
ReplyDelete"What I love about our relationship is that we can tell when each of us needs time alone and we allow that. He does his thing, I do mine. We have similar interests, but also different interests."
That's AWESOME! And sounds like a perfect match!
Perhaps some of us change throughout our lives. We are one way, but then go the other way. Or perhaps we're a little of both.
"And being from NY, I had to laugh when you talked about the people coming up to you on the streets and panhandling. So true. And I loved your response!"
Yup, being from NY, you KNOW exactly what I mean! Ha!
Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing on this topic, Elaine! Very much enjoyed your comment!
Hope you're having a great week too!
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Oh, Ron, you KNOW I'm an introvert!! Those lists describe me to a T! I abhor small talk, crowded rooms, and drama-queens. I love my "Debbie time," where I can think and recharge.
ReplyDeleteI suppose introverts do tend to gravitate to certain professions. I'd often heard that actors are mainly introverts, but so are musicians, writers, and other creative types. I worked in sales for several years (yes, I truly did!), and I can appreciate your need to not talk when you're off the clock.
I laughed out loud at your saying that you're not an ATM machine! I can't imagine the gall of people to demand money from a perfect stranger, especially when so many Help Wanted signs are all over the place.
Have a great week! xx
Thank you SO MUCH for responding, Ron! You sound so much like my friend. He started out doing drama, then discovered that he was good at comedy as well. I enjoyed seeing him in musicals! He loved Stephan Sondheim.
ReplyDeleteMy three favorite Sondheim musicals are A Little Night Music, Sweeney Todd, and Passion.
ReplyDeleteRon, I took the MB test eons ago and the results said that I was an extrovert, which I thought was odd because I have always considered myself an introvert. And reading the two lists you included in this post, I can say YES...I am very much an introvert. I'm so much like everything on both lists.
ReplyDeleteI would have pegged you for an extrovert too. Even without ever meeting you, your expressiveness seems extroverted.
But I guess what really defines each one is how the recharge and how they process what they think.
"Not only must I look like an extrovert to these strangers, but also an ATM machine." - Cracked me up!
Greetings, Clair!
ReplyDeleteWhat's interesting is that when I took the MB tests (which I took twice in the same day), the result was first introvert. But when I took it again (because the teacher who administered the test thought it was really odd), the results was extrovert. So, maybe I'm BOTH?!? But I have to say that after researching all the information about both, I feel more like an introvert.
"But I guess what really defines each one is how the recharge and how they process what they think."
Exactly!
Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing on this topic, Clair! Enjoyed your thoughts!
Have a great rest of your week!
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"Not only must I look like an extrovert to these strangers, but also an ATM machine." - ROFLMAO!
ReplyDeleteRon, that's hysterical! Only YOU could find humor in being harassed by strange strangers on the streets.
Both myself and my girlfriend are graphic artists and introverts. I don't know if that has something to do with being an artist or not, but it seems to be the norm for most creative artistic people. The lists you shared read exactly how we both are. Most of our close friends are creative type people and they too are introverts.
I like what you shared about being an actor. Also try about artists!
Great read, dude! As always.
Debbie, so sorry it took so long to respond to your comment, but for some reason it went into spam. I just found it today!
ReplyDelete"Oh, Ron, you KNOW I'm an introvert!! Those lists describe me to a T! I abhor small talk, crowded rooms, and drama-queens. I love my "Debbie time," where I can think and recharge."
HA! I knew it, I knew it, I knew it! Yes...I knew you were an introvert! Perhaps the Virgo and artist within us?
"I suppose introverts do tend to gravitate to certain professions. I'd often heard that actors are mainly introverts, but so are musicians, writers, and other creative types. I worked in sales for several years (yes, I truly did!), and I can appreciate your need to not talk when you're off the clock."
I think you absolutely right about that! I too think introvert tend to gravitate to certain professions, such as musicians, actors, and artists. As I shared, I LOVE my job. However, after an 8-hour day of talking, I just want to be quiet when I get home.
" I can't imagine the gall of people to demand money from a perfect stranger, especially when so many Help Wanted signs are all over the place."
And it happens ALL day and EVERY day to me. I swear, I must look like a walking ATM!
Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing on this topic, my friend. Again, sorry about the delay.
Have a faaaaaaaabulous weekend!
X
Hiya, Matt!
ReplyDeleteHA! And that happens to me every single day of the week, and several times a day!
"Both myself and my girlfriend are graphic artists and introverts."
Yup, I knew it! I had a feeling you were both introverts! And I think it does have something to do with being an artist/creative type person because like you, I find that in so many I know!
When I was a kid, I showed more signs of being an introvert because I was shy and very much a loner. However, when I got into acting, that's when people started thinking I was an extrovert. And I can understand why they thought that, but practically every actor I've ever known was an introvert.
Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing on this topic, Matt! Always enjoy reading your comments!
Have a grrrrrrreat weekend!
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I'm glad you found me, Ron. I checked much of yesterday for your reply to my comment, yet nothing showed up. I was considering leaving a second version when you explained the mishap. Wonder why it went to Spam in the first place??
ReplyDeleteGlad I found you too, Debbie! I have my Disqus commenting system set up to notify me via email whenever I received a comment. I get notified through my Gmail account. However, sometimes I don't think the two (Disqus and Gmail) communicate properly and then the comment either goes into my Disqus spam box (which is where I found yours), or it goes into my Gmail spam box.
ReplyDeleteGrrrrrrrrrr! Technology is wonderful, EXCEPT when it doesn't work properly.
Anyway, thanks for understanding and have a faaaaaaaabulous weekend!
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Hi, Ron!! Your Spring Flowers post ... beautiful! Today, I can feel it might a bit of a brutal summer coming but am really done with rain and cold finally, so bring it... I'll keep a hose nearby. haha Photo Mish-Mash ... omg, YES, you looked totally posh at tea time. All your photos are enjoyable.
ReplyDeleteI always thought of myself as an extrovert, and I'm sure most others would say that about me too. But we change. And especially after reading the descriptions I'd say I'm more a blend. Maybe I'm an introverted extrovert or vice versa. LOL I definitely can chat for a few minutes with strangers, and am social, and do talk talk talk with some family/close friends ... but I also absolutely LOVE being alone. On days when Ron isn't home I don't feel the least bit lonely. I can even go all day without t.v. or radio. Of course, other days I'll be dancing to disco while cleaning... but you know what I mean. Just like the down time as much or more than being out and about these days.
Have a great week!
We ARE two peas in a pod. I realized I was an introvert while on lockdown (when I had lots of alone time). Soul homework taught me that my people pleasing made me think I was an extrovert.
ReplyDeleteThis post is perfection and captures exactly what I've struggled to convey to others about my introverted personality. Those two lists are spot on. What a great post, my friend. 😘❤️
Hey there, Kari!
ReplyDeleteYup, I had a feeling your were also an introvert! And I think it's because introverts can sense other introverts.
And speaking of the lockdown, I was TOTALLY okay with being alone. I found many things to occupy myself. And I'm one of those people who can travel alone too. And that's because I don't ever alone.
Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend! Sending MUCH love and peace to you and your family at this time.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((( YOU))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
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Helloooooo there, Mary!
ReplyDeleteThank you, my friend. I so enjoyed taking those photos over the last month an a half. I was surprised how soon we got all that beautiful color because the weather has been so bipolar!
And YES about feeling that this summer is going to be brutal. But unlike you, I will take the cold and rain over the summer heat ANYTIME. I actually enjoyed all those days of rain. As I shared before, I think I'm DRACULA reincarnated. LOL!
And I do think that perhaps some people are a bit of both introvert and extrovert. So maybe that's you!
But the real way to tell which one we are is to ask ourselves the question, "Do I recharge by being alone? Or do I recharge by being around other people?"
And for me, I recharge by being alone. However, I had a partner many years ago who recharged by being around people.
Thanks so much for stopping by and catching up on my post. I really appreciate that!
Have a faaaaaaaaabulous week!
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