Don't Throw Away A Friendship With A Billionaire For A Scrub With 2.4 Win Shares

Khloe Kardashian’s boyfriend, Cleveland Cavaliers center Tristan Thompson, who reportedly cheated on Khloe while she was pregnant with their daughter True, reportedly cheated on her again. This time, it was with a lady named Jordyn Woods, who is the best friend of—and has a makeup line with—Khloe’s younger sister Kylie Jenner. It’s all sordid and dramatic, but I’m stuck on one thing and one thing only: Tristan Thompson? Tristan fucking Thompson?!

Really? The NBA player with a lower PER than Daniel Theis? He’s not even the best player on the 13-win Cavs! Jordyn, let me introduce you to ... I dunno, Kyle Kuzma? Imagine betraying your friend for a guy who shoots 64 percent from the free throw line.

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At this point Jordyn might as well have smooched Reggie Evans or Brian Scalabrine. Maybe she can find out what Danny Fortson is doing. Here’s a rule for all of us to live by: Don’t risk your friendship with a billionaire for the Cavs’ eighth-best scorer.