The phrase “living rent-free in your head” has lived rent-free in my head for some time. It feels symptomatic of the deep rot at the core of almost all human interaction online. These days it spews out of the mouths of the craven and the righteous, the world-famous and the anonymously online. Depressingly, it’s just another feature of the linguistic landscape now, so let’s check in on the latest in skull realty around the world.
Tenant: Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-MN)
Landlord: AIPAC
Rent: Free
Tenant: Auburn men’s basketball
Landlord: Tennessee men’s basketball
Rent: Free
Tenant: Guy who approves of the Mets’ trip to Syracuse
Landlord: Guy who does not approve of the Mets’ trip to Syracuse
Rent: Subsidized housing
Tenant: Cardi B
Landlord: These bitches
Rent: Free
Tenant: Spurs
Landlord: West Ham
Rent: Free
Tenant: Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY)
Landlord: Fox News hosts
Rent: Free
Tenant: Jesse Lingard, Manchester United
Landlord: Mesut Özil, Arsenal
Rent: Free
Tenant: Michael Avenatti
Landlord: R. Kelly attorney Steve Greenberg
Rent: Free
Prospective Tenant: Michael Avenatti
Landlord: Detention facility in New York’s Southern District
Rent: Free
Tenant: Matthew Tkachuk, Calgary Flames
Landlord: Drew Doughty, Los Angeles Kings
Rent: Free
Tenant: The non-corporeal spirit of John McCain
Landlord: Donald Trump
Rent: Free
Tenant: Emily Ratajkowski and Sebastian Bear-McClard
Landlord: Antoni Ghosh
Rent: Free