Congratulations to young Cooper [Last Name Withheld] of Chesterfield in Derbyshire, who recently travelled to the coastal Belgian town of De Panne and took home the crown in the EC Gull Screeching competition, which is apparently a real thing. Yes, that would be a seagull screeching competition.
From the BBC:
The family heard about the competition from a random man who overheard Cooper doing impressions at a soft-play centre and suggested Cooper could compete.
He scored 92 points out of a possible 100, which meant he won the juvenile category and also had the highest points score in the competition.
The other categories were for adults and also for "colonies", meaning a group of people doing seagull impressions.
Cooper took his lucky mascot with him – a small model seagull which he calls Stephen and spells with a "ph", but his parents call Steven Seagull, like the actor Steven Seagal.
The BBC also notes that this impressive young champion longs to be bitten by a radioactive seagull and pursue a vigilante career as Seagull Boy, and also that he recently ate some ice cream at the beach.
I, for one, am proud of you, Cooper, and I hope you will always be remembered as the man behind one of Britain's single greatest contributions to the world.
'Seagull Boy', nine, wins European screeching competition [Caroline Lowbridge / BBC]
