Donald Trump Is Breaking Up With BFF William Barr, Who Rudely Won't Invent Voter Fraud

Friends, how many of us have them? That’s a song, I think, but I don’t know which song because I am musically illiterate. But this line from this mysterious song is playing on a loop in my mind as I learn that Donald Trump is sending subs at Attorney General William Barr claiming that Barr “hasn’t done anything” about the widespread voter fraud that is only going on in Donald Trump’s mind. Trump made this complaint during a press conference after he’d just given someone the Presidential Medal of Freedom in what can only be described as a moment that will earn him the Presidential Medal of Pettiness.

“This is probably the most fraudulent election that anyone’s ever seen,” the loser of the election said, once again, without providing any concrete evidence. Trump blathered on about his extreme disappointment that AG Barr hadn’t done enough to investigate and subsequently prove that fraud had taken place—which just isn’t what you do when your friends ask you to manufacture a nationwide problem. Instead of just doing what his friend asked, Barr sided with reality saying at a press conference on Tuesday that there was no fraud “on a scale that could have affected a different outcome.”

Trump didn’t buy that excuse and still believes that the AG’s office should waste resources and funds to investigate and prove fraud for an election that ended literally a month ago. It’s going to be such a strange feeling when this man is gone and we go back to having concerns about normal things like the crumbling healthcare system instead of baseless claims about ballots in the garbage. [Politico]

Christmas 2020 will NOT be the most wonderful time of the year. Especially not for all the people still forced to go to holiday work parties, hosted by Mike Pompeo. Despite warning after warning about the holiday season seeing a potential increase in the infection rate, Pompeo invited hundreds of people and their breath droplets to several holiday parties at the State Department.

A copy of one invitation, obtained by The Washington Post, welcomes guests to a Dec. 15 event titled “Diplomacy at Home for the Holidays” in the Benjamin Franklin Room, the department’s flagship reception space, which features cut-glass chandeliers and towering Corinthian columns. Invitations have already gone out to 900 people, said two U.S. officials familiar with the planning, raising concerns about a potential superspreader event.

So even though Dr. Fauci, federal government officials, and state leaders have made it abundantly clear that Americans should not travel for the holiday season in an effort to slow the spread, Mike fucking Pompeo will still be getting turnt in the Benjamin Franklin Room. It’s a wonderful life. [The Washington Post]

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has some new merch that will definitely make your Republican family members hate you more than they already do. [Twitter]
Not everyone Trump hired will be out of a job once Biden moves into the oval. [ProPublica]
Ivanka Trump is being deposed. I’m not laughing, you’re laughing. [NBC]
Former presidents Bush, Clinton, and Obama have volunteered to take the covid vaccine to prove it’s safe. Okay? [CNN]
House Democrats voted on their favorite Christmas movie and the winner was not Elf so the vote is irrelevant. [Twitter]
Kelly Loeffler donated portions of her salary to anti-abortion and anti-LGBTQ groups. [Buzzfeed]
Where does Rudy Giuliani find witnesses? [Twitter]